A Short Story Using Unreasonably Complicated Words by Ruby Miller

This is an unreasonably complicated story using words you might not even know. I certainly had to look stuff up while writing it. Read it and see how you do.

I was in motion down a course when I transpired upon an unintelligent fleshy creature. I presumed it rather cuddlesome and proceeded to make affectionate noises. It returned my osculate gestures with ebullient optimism. It sprouted a pair of wings and ascended to my cranium where it commenced burrowing in my locks. I squawked and sprinted, feeling horrifically petrified. The organism bounced off and departed on its direction. 

Skit by Shreya Kakkad, Ruby Miller, and Eva Gunderman

Peyton: Toy guns can’t kill people-or so I thought… It all started one day in July...
~Past~
Jamie: {on phone talking to Quinn and Peyton} Come outside, it's really nice and I can bring out some nerf guns!

Quinn: All right, just let me finish my food.
Peyton: Well, I’ll come over right now.
{Peyton walks over to Jamie.}
Jamie: {Brings out the nerf guns}

Peyton: Can I use the crossbow?
Jamie: Yea sure. {Grabs a nerf crossbow from Jamie’s hands}

{Quinn walks out}
Quinn: Hey guys! What do you got left for me?
Jamie: Just another nerf gun.
Quinn: Cool. {Grabs nerf gun from Jamie}
Jamie: Are you both ready start?

Quinn: Yea sure.
Peyton: same.
Jamie: Everyone, find your bases!
{everyone goes to different sections of the stage}
Quinn: 5...4...3...2...1… sTART!
{everybody begins shooting their finger guns/crossbow, making “pew-pew” noises as the do}
Peyton: {stage whisper} Hey Quinn, do you want to team up against Jamie?
Quinn: {stage whisper} Let me think about it…
Jamie: What are you guys talking about?
Quinn: {to Jamie} Oh, nothing! {to Peyton} I think I will.
Peyton: Let’s take a break and reload our nerf guns.
Jamie: Okay.
{everybody walks to their bases and reloads}
Quinn: All right let’s start again!
Jamie: 3...2...1...sTART!!!
{Quinn and Peyton begin shooting directly at Jamie}
Jamie: Okay, guys. This is really unfair. stop teaming up.
Quinn: All’s fair in love and war.

Jamie: Whatever, I’m still quitting! {leaves the game and sits on the side}
Quinn: Guess it's just you and me now, Peyton.
Peyton: Alright. Game on! {Peyton and Quinn begin shooting at each other, Quinn falls to the floor and Quinn pulls out “blood” }
Peyton and Jamie: {Gasp!}
Jamie: {Runs to Quinn and starts checking if he/she is okay}
Quinn: Woah, why do I hurt so much? {faints}
Jamie: {checks Quinn’s pulse} I...I don’t feel anything! {single tear}
Peyton: Y...Y...You mean he/she’s dead!!! {starts crying}
{after they have calmed down…}
Jamie: {picks up “nerf gun” and looks in the chamber} Um...these aren’t foam...

Peyton: What?!
Jamie: These...are real…(voice trails off)

DAILY GLOBAL HOTWIRE!!!! BUTTERFLY IMPERSONATOR by Ruby Miller

          There is evidence of a butterfly impersonating the monarch butterfly. This butterfly, it's name not yet known, violently flitters around stealing goods from flowers. The monarch butterfly it is impersonating is known for being very dangerous and many of the Bird Police Force (BPF) are told to stay away. So far, impersonating the devilish monarch has proven successful.
          It is dangerous to engage contact with the monarch as it is filled with poison. However, the impersonator is not. Scientists have come up with a way to expose the false butterfly, but have yet to reveal it to the public.
          The moral of the story? Protect your gardens. There's a hardened criminal on the loose.

Titanic by Ruby Miller

A bowl enters the water
A ship on the dock of uncertainty 
No one will pull the plug
The water will not empty

The bowl pops up 
It tries to stay afloat
But it is pushed
Down
    Down
        Down

The water flows into it
But know one will help
No one is near enough
The water stays

The bowl sinks down
It becomes one
With the water
It is gone

Bits and pieces
Of leftovers flow up
But they are no good
They are no longer edible